Rachel Adler (![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif){kind=small} dogisdead) wrote,@ 2004-05-01 21:51:00 |
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I feel a tightness in my gut, I hate this.
I'm scared to go to the unveiling tomorrow. I'm still in the city because going home would solidify the purpose for doing so. I don't want to smoke, or change my mood via illicit substance. However, I'm not content with remaining this...numb. This is how I felt for the first few weeks after my mother died, and it's so frustrating.
Tomorrow will be quick and painless. It really is only 15 minutes, but the effects will clearly span the entire day, possibly longer. I wish I were somewhere else, in another time.
I'm scared to go to the unveiling tomorrow. I'm still in the city because going home would solidify the purpose for doing so. I don't want to smoke, or change my mood via illicit substance. However, I'm not content with remaining this...numb. This is how I felt for the first few weeks after my mother died, and it's so frustrating.
Tomorrow will be quick and painless. It really is only 15 minutes, but the effects will clearly span the entire day, possibly longer. I wish I were somewhere else, in another time.
